Why hello there! It’s been a while since I’ve provided any sort of update on my new job. I simply don’t have any time anymore! Where does it go? I am amazed by people who have full time jobs and kids and/or school. Are they superheroes? And the people who work two full-time jobs… how is that even possible?
It’s been the good kind of busy, though. I feel important and needed and worthwhile. Empowered, really. I’ve been told I’ll be interacting with the president and CEO quite often, so that’s exciting! I’ve already met the president a couple times and shook his hand, so *squeal*! I started on Tuesday so I’ve worked three full days so far. They’ve been absolutely amazing. Not only is the job itself quite fun but the people I work with are all fun and super nice and friendly! Not to mention supportive. I’ve had people tell me that if I ever have any questions and my boss has stepped away to feel free to ask them and a few people have let me know they’re here for me. The employees take care of each other. Yesterday another girl in my same space got flowers delivered to her and I was the one who got to take them up to her because I had been sitting down at the front desk training with one of the receptionists (he was doing my job before I got here, he had kinda just took the project on even though it wasn’t his job, so he knows all the tricks). It’s such a fun environment!
My boss took me to lunch on Tuesday; apparently the company pays for everybody’s lunch their first day! We went to this really cool salad/bowl place that is now on my favorites list; being on the Paleo diet makes finding a good restaurant a big deal, especially if it has organic options. It’s called Flower Child, if anyone wants to look it up! I got a salad to go last night after work because I was too tired to make food. It was amazing! Tuesday I got the curry bowl with chicken, boiled potatoes, and veggies, and that was great. Anything with potatoes is great.
This week has been a lot of training, talking, and meeting new people. I’m exhausted, all the time. Especially since last night was the first night I actually got 8 hours of sleep (though I woke up feeling like a zombie because my body wanted to sleep for like, 16 more hours).
I set up my signature on my e-mail today and honestly I feel so fancy. My boss said that I’ll probably get business cards in a few months. BUSINESS CARDS. BUSINESS CARDS. CARDS FOR ME A BUSINESS CARD FOR ME MY OWN WOW. And they give all the employees these little tag cards to get into the doors and I clip it onto my belt and feel like the fanciest person on the planet. I feel like my advancement into “mature adult” is on fast-forward!
Also, my boss had me study company material after work on Tuesday and I recited it to her the next morning and she was just blown away, so… *sunglasses emoji*
I’m learning so much! About the company and how to do my job, but also about how to interact with people and present myself. It’s been good! I feel like after a few years of this I’ll have it down pat and be a real professional!
As you can see, I’m feeling pretty optimistic.
Which is good, since I had quite high expectations. I had written a post on Sunday night, but didn’t publish it because I was going to add more (but then didn’t), so I might as well publish what I have now:
This evening I was feeling morose, depressed, gloomy, anxious, unsettled, etc etc, for no apparent reason.
But as I started thinking about why I might be feeling that way, I realized that my main cause of anxiety – starting my new job on Tuesday – was what I was most excited about, so why was I wasting my time with all these negative feelings? I mean, I’m sure I’m going to be a nervous wreck tomorrow, that’s only normal before starting a new job, but what isn’t normal is wallowing in what feels too much like self pity when there is absolutely nothing to feel pity for.
What I feel now is excitement, gratitude, and pride. I am proud of myself, and I am ever ever so grateful. I’m grateful for the opportunity, the people who led me to it, and the people who gave me a chance. It’s hard to explain, and I hesitate to be this optimistic before I’ve even started the job, but I have a really good feeling about it. I’ve never felt this way before. I mean, this isn’t like my dream job or anything; I’m not getting paid to travel the world and resolve international conflict through my good humor and quick wit, but I feel like this is meant to be. That my life is finally, finally, going in the right direction. Like there is infinite possibility, a world of opportunity, all starting here. Right now. That if I work hard and be the best possible version of myself, I can do anything. I can have everything I’ve ever wanted. The talent acquisition person I’ve been working with even told me that when my boss eventually moves up, I’ll be in a great position to take over her job, which is just astounding. There might even be possibilities of transferring internationally; my boss and her boss know that’s something that I want. The company is growing quickly and it just seems like there will be so many opportunities. I am so excited to see where this next step in my life will take me!
I also feel pride for the person I am. Like most people in their early twenties, I have been discovering more and more about who I truly am, and you know what? I like that person. There’s a lot of room for improvement, but that’s what makes life exciting. I am living life for me and I am coming to terms with my identity; I am who I am; I like what I like; I am enough, and only I have the power to dictate what that entails. I have lived so much of my life feeling bad for who I am, or wanting to apologize for it. Those days or gone, or at least I live every day trying to be just that much better. I may have a life that seems boring to some, but I have family and friends and a variety of interests that I love. I am excited for when I can buy a vinyl player and start my vinyl collection and grow my book collection and attend symphonies and art shows and musicals and concerts. I am excited to travel, to experience life in new cultures and meet new people, to collect music and books and knowledge in foreign languages. I can’t wait til I have a steady enough income that allows me to do all these things and most importantly, to give back to the people who deserve it so much more than I.