weariness

anger leaked out of me

melted into a puddle at my feet

fatigue settled into my soles

into the marrow of my bones

 

too tired…

…to do anything…

…about anything…

so just let it be.

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irregular

(1/2)

i feel like i am drowning but maybe that is just life

in the deepest ocean and on the longest road

i am sinking, i am running, i am reeling

 

why don’t they love me like i love them

i need them to hold me but they are not here

they never were and that is so like me

 

there is a woman who lives inside me

she says she loves me and her name is rose

i don’t know how to find her most of the time

but she suggests that I should be a little more kind

 

(2/2)

i always thought i was kind

i thought i was so many things

but lately, i think of me and i think of nothing

 

when i am like this

i don’t look people in the eye

i am afraid of what they might see

i am afraid they will see what i see

nothing

 

there is a certain beauty in sadness

at least there is something there to look at

something to hide behind

when you can’t hide behind a lie